I think its safe to say my tiny baby has officially gone! Lately i have found myself wishing i could slow the time down! I cant believe i haven't blogged since she was 8 months old! She's now 13 Months!!
Last time i posted, we were worrying about her development being behind. I'm not really worried about her anymore, she is still quite behind with some things but she's learning so much now its amazing! Here are some of the latest things that have got us going all gooey over her...
* If you sing 'Pat a Cake' to her, she starts clapping her hands straight away, then during the last line ' Put it in the oven for baby and me' she pats her tummy!
* She now nods her head whilst saying 'yeah yeah yeah' .
*She can pick her own sippy cup up and drink from it.
*She now shuffles on her bottom at a pretty decent speed, and can get just about anywhere she chooses to go!
* If you tell her to have a drink , she immediately picks her cup up and starts drinking!
* When we sing '5 current buns' She gives her her imaginary penny, and pretends to eat her current bun at the end of every line.
*When singing 'Wind the Bobbin' she attempts to do the winding action with her arms, claps in all the right places, and points to the ceiling.
*She can do the actions of a fish, and a chicken, and makes cat noises when asked.
* She knows where the clock,Dolly, light, ceiling fish and Lucy Lamb (cuddly toy) and her toy train are and will point to them when asked.
* When asked how old she is she holds up one finger.
* She knows where her hair, knees, toes, ears, Tongue, teeth, head, and hands are, and will point to her nose when asked in both French and English.
*She gives kisses whenever she's asked to (and even when she's not!)
*She can hold her fork and spoon and feed herself an entire meal.
* When we're putting her trousers on, she pulls them up herself, in attempt to "find her piggies".
* When she finishes a meal, she gives herself a round of applause.
* If we hold her coat out for her, she now puts her arms through by herself.
* She waves as soon as you say goodbye.
* When you say "hello" she pretends to pick up a phone
*She can pull herself onto her knees.
* She can brush her own teeth, and hair.
* She dances whenever she hears music.
*She recognizes characters on the television.
* As soon as she sees a cat, she makes cat noises.
* When we sing 'Heads, shoulders, knee's and toes, she can correctly point to all apart from shoulders at the moment.
* When on her feet, and holding onto our hands, she has recently began to put one foot in front of the other and take steps, which is a new achievement for her, but she's still heavily relying on our support.
* She picks up her Dolly, and its bottle, and holds the bottle over the 'baby's' mouth, pretending to feed her. (sooo cute!!)
So she may not be walking or quite crawling just yet, but she's certainly learning a lot. She's become such a little character over the past few months as well. We still cant go anywhere without being stopped several times and complimented on what a happy little girl she is, or what a beautiful smile she has.
She had a fantastic first Birthday, surrounded by family and friends.. she's already a very popular little girl! We had a party on the Sunday before her birthday, with special guest Peppa Pig, and a family trip to Skegness on her actual birthday, where she had her first ever ride on a donkey and absolutely loved it!
We had her weighed on her birthday and she was exactly 18lb 1oz, so growing nicely, but still tiny really :)
We're now looking forward to her second Christmas, its going to be soo magical this year as she's at such a wonderful age.
I'm still loving being a mummy, i absolutely love the age she's at now, watching her grow and learn is amazing! I'm going to try and get back into regular blogging again. So much has happened in the past five months its impossible to remember it all.
Adam and i have had a few chats lately about the plans for 'Little someone Elce number two' .. and unfortunately money is our main concern. At the moment, we're lucky to have family looking after Izzy while we're at work, but i wouldn't expect them to look after two. But at the same time, we couldn't afford childcare, but it would be a big loss for me to stop working.. so we're going to have to have a serious think about how we plan our family.
My friend, Becki had her second baby at the beginning of September, and Izzy got incredibly jealous when she saw me hold her at first. However, we recently visited again, and she absolutely loved baby Heidi and kept kissing her.
I'd like to have a bit more time with Izzy being an only child before a second one enters the scene, but i do now think she will like to become a big sister eventually!
It feels good to have finally blogged again.. I couldn't believe it when i logged on and saw that iv had 13,873 views! I'm determined to not leave it so long this time!
Love love love xxxx
Showing posts with label weight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight. Show all posts
Friday, October 19, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Feeling low :(
I'm feeling quite down at the moment and in need of a good moan, so here goes.
It's not really motherhood that I'm down about, that side of things is going quite well at the moment. Isabelle is doing really well on the new milk and meds, and managing to keep much more down. She generally much happier and more settled, her hair has been growing beautifully while she's been on this new milk too!
I'm feeling very low about myself. My confidence has hit rock bottom. I cant bare to look at myself, or get undressed, or even go out in public at times. I feel like i have no clothes that fit me properly and i just want to hide somewhere away from myself and cry.
I have never been this fat in my life and i absolutely hate myself. I cant blame it all on having a baby either because I'd put a considerable amount of weight on before i even got pregnant. I was even fat on my wedding day, which makes me feel sick. I hate the thought that the photos and memories from that day will be a big part of our lives forever, and i don't even like how i looked then.
I was a size 8 when Adam and i got together and my low confidence now is just making me paranoid about everything. Why would he want to be with me while I'm like this? He could do so much better.
The thing that makes it a million times worse is that I'm trying so hard and getting no results. Iv cut my portion sizes down to really quite small, I'm eating mainly vegetables, doing lots of walking and spending time on my exercise bike (which fascinates Isabelle) and nothings happening.
This 'Depo' injection i had can supposedly make u rapidly gain weight, so i wonder if that's whats stopping me losing it. Something needs to change though, and soon
.
Whenever i go out i feel like every ones staring at me, thinking how huge i am. No matter where i am, shopping, just walking down the street etc I'm constantly looking around to see if i can see anyone bigger than me.. and scarily i often cant.
I dont want to be a big fat lump for Isabelle either, i want to be able to run about and chase her and play with energy for as long as she needs me to. I want to be healthy for her, and someone she looks up to and wants to be like.
I take Izzy to be weighed every other Thursday too, so there are loads of new mums all in the same room there, it depresses me to see what lovely figures a lot of them have, you cant tell they're recently had a baby, some a lot more recently than me too :(
It frustrates me to think iv never considered myself as slim, yet if i look back on old photos now, id do ANYTHING to have my old figure back!
Iv found some old pictures out, which I'm gonna get printed and stick all over the house, I'm gonna carry one around in my purse, as my 'thinspiration' to work extra hard. I need to do everything i can to lose this weight and regain my confidence.
It's not really motherhood that I'm down about, that side of things is going quite well at the moment. Isabelle is doing really well on the new milk and meds, and managing to keep much more down. She generally much happier and more settled, her hair has been growing beautifully while she's been on this new milk too!
I'm feeling very low about myself. My confidence has hit rock bottom. I cant bare to look at myself, or get undressed, or even go out in public at times. I feel like i have no clothes that fit me properly and i just want to hide somewhere away from myself and cry.
I have never been this fat in my life and i absolutely hate myself. I cant blame it all on having a baby either because I'd put a considerable amount of weight on before i even got pregnant. I was even fat on my wedding day, which makes me feel sick. I hate the thought that the photos and memories from that day will be a big part of our lives forever, and i don't even like how i looked then.
I was a size 8 when Adam and i got together and my low confidence now is just making me paranoid about everything. Why would he want to be with me while I'm like this? He could do so much better.
The thing that makes it a million times worse is that I'm trying so hard and getting no results. Iv cut my portion sizes down to really quite small, I'm eating mainly vegetables, doing lots of walking and spending time on my exercise bike (which fascinates Isabelle) and nothings happening.
This 'Depo' injection i had can supposedly make u rapidly gain weight, so i wonder if that's whats stopping me losing it. Something needs to change though, and soon
.
Whenever i go out i feel like every ones staring at me, thinking how huge i am. No matter where i am, shopping, just walking down the street etc I'm constantly looking around to see if i can see anyone bigger than me.. and scarily i often cant.
I dont want to be a big fat lump for Isabelle either, i want to be able to run about and chase her and play with energy for as long as she needs me to. I want to be healthy for her, and someone she looks up to and wants to be like.
I take Izzy to be weighed every other Thursday too, so there are loads of new mums all in the same room there, it depresses me to see what lovely figures a lot of them have, you cant tell they're recently had a baby, some a lot more recently than me too :(
It frustrates me to think iv never considered myself as slim, yet if i look back on old photos now, id do ANYTHING to have my old figure back!
Iv found some old pictures out, which I'm gonna get printed and stick all over the house, I'm gonna carry one around in my purse, as my 'thinspiration' to work extra hard. I need to do everything i can to lose this weight and regain my confidence.
Friday, January 20, 2012
A very tough week!
This post is probably going to be completely opposite to the last. I had been feeling soo positive, and things we're going so well. How fast things can change...
In my last post i mention my battle with trying to get Isabelle's new medication down her. We managed it eventually. She was on it Friday, Saturday and Sunday, by Monday i stopped giving it to her. It was supposed to stop her being sick, and she was being more sick, she was screaming in pain, waking through the nights and she had terrible diarrhea. I hated seeing her so poorly, so as we were at the hospital on Wednesday anyway, i decided to stop it until i had spoken to them.
Monday was probably one of the worst days so far, in fact, i honestly struggled to get through the day. She was screaming in pain constantly and i couldn't do anything for her. I tried rocking her, singing to her (which normally always calms her down) pacing the house with her, letting her lay down, sit up, everything. It was awful, in the end i just sat and cried with her.
She's been taking less than half her recommended amount in feeds and she's so sick I'm sure most of what she does take comes back up. Her weight really is becoming a worry now, which is another reason why i stopped that medication. If her weights already dipping dramatically, the last thing we want is for her to have diarrhea as well as her sickness.
Tuesday was a much better day, but we were out and about a fair amount which probably helped. We got the bus into town in the morning, as i had arranged a meeting about my return to work. This had been a hot topic for us throughout the week, as we did many sums and tried to work out what would work out for the best. It was a depressing discovery. I worked out that for the number of hours per week i wanted to work, i would earn around £141.17 a week. I then looked into childcare, and to cover those hours with a childminder would cost us around £100 a week! Which would mean id be leaving my baby girl with a stranger, for 22 hours a week (3 hours included for the traveling to take her and fetch her) for £41.17! Another way i saw this, is its like me working my 19 hours for £2.16 an hour, It seems crazy. We then had a couple of offers from family for looking after her.
The hours we arranged for me to work are: All day Tuesday, All day Wednesday, and 12:30-5:30 on a Friday. My mums day off is Tuesday, so she's going to have her then. My sisters day off is Wednesday, she's volunteered to do that, so its only Fridays we need to sort. So 6 hours of childcare to find, which will make life much easier for us. I also have to work the occasional Saturday. When i work a Saturday i wont be working one of either the Tuesday or the Wednesday, which means my mum and Abi will at least get a break every now and then. I feel much better about going back to work since i had this meeting. I know there will be a lot of support there for me and i think I'll actually enjoy it!
I also feel 100% better knowing that for the majority of the time, Isabelle will be being looked after by family, who know all of her special little requirements and will look after her with the same love that we do.
I'm beginning to think a nursery for 6 hours on a Friday might be quite good for Isabelle too. As long as we find a very good one who we can trust do get all her medications right and know all of her allergies i think it'll do her good. She'll be around other children, and when she comes to the age where she has to go to nursery, she'll be more used to it. I have just rung a nursery and Adam and i are going to view it this afternoon :)
So my first day back at work is officially Friday 20th April!
On Wednesday we had Isabelle's hospital appointment. They had a good look at her and checked her weight charts and i explained all of my concerns. To cut a long story short, it turns out she was still reacting to even the prescribed milk that she was on, so they have changed that as well as putting her on another new medication, which (touch wood) we are managing OK with so far. I was very brave and gathered the courage to ask for a second opinion this time, as i really have had enough of seeing her so poorly and its dragged on for so long now. In the end i saw three doctors, who all said the same thing.. so I'm feeling quite confident this time. Isabelle has now had one full day on the new milk, which was yesterday and during the whole day she had 19oz! Which makes a nice change to the usual 12-13 she was having before.. so things are looking up. She is, however, still being incredibly sick, but i guess the medication can take time to get working.
I am still bleeding, its been over two weeks now! I spoke to the hospital this morning and my operation is now on the 8th March! Which is 7 whole weeks away! So it will be the 19th April (ish) before I'm back to my normal self :( I cant believe they are leaving me that long. The thought of being in pain for all those weeks makes me feel so down :(
Love love love xx
In my last post i mention my battle with trying to get Isabelle's new medication down her. We managed it eventually. She was on it Friday, Saturday and Sunday, by Monday i stopped giving it to her. It was supposed to stop her being sick, and she was being more sick, she was screaming in pain, waking through the nights and she had terrible diarrhea. I hated seeing her so poorly, so as we were at the hospital on Wednesday anyway, i decided to stop it until i had spoken to them.
Monday was probably one of the worst days so far, in fact, i honestly struggled to get through the day. She was screaming in pain constantly and i couldn't do anything for her. I tried rocking her, singing to her (which normally always calms her down) pacing the house with her, letting her lay down, sit up, everything. It was awful, in the end i just sat and cried with her.
She's been taking less than half her recommended amount in feeds and she's so sick I'm sure most of what she does take comes back up. Her weight really is becoming a worry now, which is another reason why i stopped that medication. If her weights already dipping dramatically, the last thing we want is for her to have diarrhea as well as her sickness.
Tuesday was a much better day, but we were out and about a fair amount which probably helped. We got the bus into town in the morning, as i had arranged a meeting about my return to work. This had been a hot topic for us throughout the week, as we did many sums and tried to work out what would work out for the best. It was a depressing discovery. I worked out that for the number of hours per week i wanted to work, i would earn around £141.17 a week. I then looked into childcare, and to cover those hours with a childminder would cost us around £100 a week! Which would mean id be leaving my baby girl with a stranger, for 22 hours a week (3 hours included for the traveling to take her and fetch her) for £41.17! Another way i saw this, is its like me working my 19 hours for £2.16 an hour, It seems crazy. We then had a couple of offers from family for looking after her.
The hours we arranged for me to work are: All day Tuesday, All day Wednesday, and 12:30-5:30 on a Friday. My mums day off is Tuesday, so she's going to have her then. My sisters day off is Wednesday, she's volunteered to do that, so its only Fridays we need to sort. So 6 hours of childcare to find, which will make life much easier for us. I also have to work the occasional Saturday. When i work a Saturday i wont be working one of either the Tuesday or the Wednesday, which means my mum and Abi will at least get a break every now and then. I feel much better about going back to work since i had this meeting. I know there will be a lot of support there for me and i think I'll actually enjoy it!
I also feel 100% better knowing that for the majority of the time, Isabelle will be being looked after by family, who know all of her special little requirements and will look after her with the same love that we do.
I'm beginning to think a nursery for 6 hours on a Friday might be quite good for Isabelle too. As long as we find a very good one who we can trust do get all her medications right and know all of her allergies i think it'll do her good. She'll be around other children, and when she comes to the age where she has to go to nursery, she'll be more used to it. I have just rung a nursery and Adam and i are going to view it this afternoon :)
So my first day back at work is officially Friday 20th April!
On Wednesday we had Isabelle's hospital appointment. They had a good look at her and checked her weight charts and i explained all of my concerns. To cut a long story short, it turns out she was still reacting to even the prescribed milk that she was on, so they have changed that as well as putting her on another new medication, which (touch wood) we are managing OK with so far. I was very brave and gathered the courage to ask for a second opinion this time, as i really have had enough of seeing her so poorly and its dragged on for so long now. In the end i saw three doctors, who all said the same thing.. so I'm feeling quite confident this time. Isabelle has now had one full day on the new milk, which was yesterday and during the whole day she had 19oz! Which makes a nice change to the usual 12-13 she was having before.. so things are looking up. She is, however, still being incredibly sick, but i guess the medication can take time to get working.
I am still bleeding, its been over two weeks now! I spoke to the hospital this morning and my operation is now on the 8th March! Which is 7 whole weeks away! So it will be the 19th April (ish) before I'm back to my normal self :( I cant believe they are leaving me that long. The thought of being in pain for all those weeks makes me feel so down :(
Love love love xx
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Just a short update!
There isn't a great deal of news at the moment really, i just wanted to do a short post to keep things going. Isabelle's still doing really well with her routine, sleeping beautifully through the night and having lots of fun at playtime! We've started a mother and baby swimming session on a Thursday too, which we love! I also started my little club last Wednesday, and it was a great success!
We had Isabelle weighed on Thursday.. 5 weeks ago she weighed 12lb 8oz.. and now she weighs 12lb 12.5oz which really isn't a good weight gain, and the health visitors are becoming pretty concerned now. She's still being incredibly sick and not eating much at all. According to the information on her tin of formula she should be having approximately 35oz a day now, and she's having about 15! :(
I attempted to start her new medication yesterday, which is supposed to stop her sickness. Its a liquid medication which i have to give her in a syringe (2ml). The trouble is, it tastes disgusting (I've tried it because of her reaction). I have tried three different ways of getting her to take it and at the moment it seems impossible. We are back at the Hospital on Wednesday though, so i will see what they say there.
In other news, i have now been bleeding for ten days, which I'm sure isn't normal, but i cant seem to get through to them at the hospital. I still don't have a new date for my operation so i need to contact them as soon as possible. The pain is really bad now so i just want it over and done with.
I already cant believe how fast this year is going. We are mid way through January already. I only have about six weeks left until i need to give notice of my return to work, ( We cant afford for me to not go back). Adam and i have decided to spend some time tomorrow looking into childminders in the Worksop area, although we wont be able to sort anything out fully until i know what days i will be working etc. The thought of it all makes me feel sick at the moment to be honest. I cant bare the thought of leaving my little girl. I love the time we spend together so much!
I hope you are all enjoying your January! Please feel free to leave comments, so i don't feel like I'm rambling on to myself!
Love love love! Milly and little Moomin xx
We had Isabelle weighed on Thursday.. 5 weeks ago she weighed 12lb 8oz.. and now she weighs 12lb 12.5oz which really isn't a good weight gain, and the health visitors are becoming pretty concerned now. She's still being incredibly sick and not eating much at all. According to the information on her tin of formula she should be having approximately 35oz a day now, and she's having about 15! :(
I attempted to start her new medication yesterday, which is supposed to stop her sickness. Its a liquid medication which i have to give her in a syringe (2ml). The trouble is, it tastes disgusting (I've tried it because of her reaction). I have tried three different ways of getting her to take it and at the moment it seems impossible. We are back at the Hospital on Wednesday though, so i will see what they say there.
In other news, i have now been bleeding for ten days, which I'm sure isn't normal, but i cant seem to get through to them at the hospital. I still don't have a new date for my operation so i need to contact them as soon as possible. The pain is really bad now so i just want it over and done with.
I already cant believe how fast this year is going. We are mid way through January already. I only have about six weeks left until i need to give notice of my return to work, ( We cant afford for me to not go back). Adam and i have decided to spend some time tomorrow looking into childminders in the Worksop area, although we wont be able to sort anything out fully until i know what days i will be working etc. The thought of it all makes me feel sick at the moment to be honest. I cant bare the thought of leaving my little girl. I love the time we spend together so much!
I hope you are all enjoying your January! Please feel free to leave comments, so i don't feel like I'm rambling on to myself!
Love love love! Milly and little Moomin xx
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Happy New Year!!
It's new years day today and i wish i could say I'm feeling full of glee and excitement, like i was this time last year. I know it's going to be a very special year with our little lady but I'm feeling rather down today.
I think its because we've had such an amazing Christmas, and now it's all over, it's such an anti-climax. There are three things i am concentrating on now which are making me feel completely awful.
1) I only have one day left with Adam being off work, and at the moment he's really ill. I'm going to miss him insane amounts when he goes back (actually getting tearful writing this). I've got so used to having him around, and having help with Isabelle over the past two weeks and i just know I'm going to feel so alone when he goes back.
2) It's my operation on Tuesday and i really am scared. People probably think I'm being a wimp, i know people have operations all the time, but I've never been put to sleep in my life and I'm terrified. They said when i wake up I'll have tubes all over me and an oxygen mask etc, its going to be so scary! It makes it even worse to think that i shouldn't even have to be going through this! If they'd done it right in the first place i wouldn't have anything to be worrying about!
3) I am becoming increasingly aware that my 'return to work' date is getting closer and closer. It isn't until April, but the past few months have gone so quickly, i know it'll be here in no time. The thought of leaving my baby girl makes me feel physically sick. I have got to trust a stranger with her life! She's the most precious thing in the world to me, how do i choose a random person to replace me in looking after her? The thing that worries me most, is Isabelle now has a list of medications as long as my arm, so i need to trust that the carers will get it all right! I honestly can't bare the thought of it at the moment, but i know its something i need to start thinking about.
New Year usually makes me feel so positive, i wish i could just shake myself out of this gloomy mood I'm in today. I think its just a mixture of tiredness and loneliness today. Adam was incredibly ill in the middle of the night last night, so i was up between 3:30- 6 looking after him and cleaning up. It appears he has food poisoning :( He's been in bed all day and it absolutely broken my heart to see him so poorly. Isabelle's gone to Birmingham with Adams mum to meet some of the family, so I've spent the day on my own. I am really glad Izzy has gone on her little day trip though because its meant Adams had a day of undisturbed sleep, and I've managed to have a bit of a rest myself. I just feel exhausted, yet restless, if that makes any sense at all.
I'm going to make myself a nice strong coffee now, and try and crack on with some housework, because as daft as it seems, that normally cheers me up. I've got just less than 3 hours before i need to fetch Isabelle, so I'm going to have an hour of work, then theres a film on i want to watch. So hopefully this gloomy mood will fizzle away this evening. If not within the next couple of hours, I'm sure it will when i get a snuggle and a beautiful smile from my little girl!
I have got four New Years Resolutions which i am determined to stick to this year.
1) Lose weight!! I want to lose approximately 3 stone. I put so much weight on when i was pregnant (and quite a bit during the months before) and my confidence is at rock bottom at the moment. In fact, i haven't even had that many photo's of me with Isabelle, because i can hardly bare to look at myself. I think Adams getting pretty fed up of me moaning about it all the time! So by the end of 2012 i will be fitting in my size 10's again :p .. hopefully! I really am feeling determined with it though, and I've got good plans for weight loss this year :)
2) Be more careful with money. Obviously while I've been on Maternity leave, our money situation has been very different. In the end, we still managed to have a wonderful Christmas, but we're struggling for it now! I'm going to be a lot more careful about what i spend my money on, and aim to put £20 a month away so I've got it saved up to do my Christmas shopping in November. Every year so far, we've had to try and do all the shopping from one payday or two, and its really hard, so I'm determined to save throughout the year. Not just for Chrismas, in general.
3) Be more organised at home. If there are any of you reading this who have babies yourself, will you please comment on this post and let me know how you get on with housework and a little one please?
4) Spend more time as a family. We don't really get a lot of time to spend together, as Adam works Monday to Friday and then Referee's on Saturdays and Sundays. We normally have 1:30pm-6pm on a Sunday to spend together, and i want to make sure we really start to make the most of that time. I want to aim to visit family more too. Grandparents/Aunties and Uncles etc.. I don't want them to miss Isabelle growing up.
So they are my four resolutions.. nothing too difficult there i don't think, but I'm determined to work hard on each and every one of them :)
I've just had a message to say my baby girl is on her way back from Birmingham :) .. so I'd better get some work done while i still have the chance! Then she can snuggle up with me and we can watch the film together. Loneliness sorted! Feeling better already :)
Happy New Year!!
I think its because we've had such an amazing Christmas, and now it's all over, it's such an anti-climax. There are three things i am concentrating on now which are making me feel completely awful.
1) I only have one day left with Adam being off work, and at the moment he's really ill. I'm going to miss him insane amounts when he goes back (actually getting tearful writing this). I've got so used to having him around, and having help with Isabelle over the past two weeks and i just know I'm going to feel so alone when he goes back.
2) It's my operation on Tuesday and i really am scared. People probably think I'm being a wimp, i know people have operations all the time, but I've never been put to sleep in my life and I'm terrified. They said when i wake up I'll have tubes all over me and an oxygen mask etc, its going to be so scary! It makes it even worse to think that i shouldn't even have to be going through this! If they'd done it right in the first place i wouldn't have anything to be worrying about!
3) I am becoming increasingly aware that my 'return to work' date is getting closer and closer. It isn't until April, but the past few months have gone so quickly, i know it'll be here in no time. The thought of leaving my baby girl makes me feel physically sick. I have got to trust a stranger with her life! She's the most precious thing in the world to me, how do i choose a random person to replace me in looking after her? The thing that worries me most, is Isabelle now has a list of medications as long as my arm, so i need to trust that the carers will get it all right! I honestly can't bare the thought of it at the moment, but i know its something i need to start thinking about.
New Year usually makes me feel so positive, i wish i could just shake myself out of this gloomy mood I'm in today. I think its just a mixture of tiredness and loneliness today. Adam was incredibly ill in the middle of the night last night, so i was up between 3:30- 6 looking after him and cleaning up. It appears he has food poisoning :( He's been in bed all day and it absolutely broken my heart to see him so poorly. Isabelle's gone to Birmingham with Adams mum to meet some of the family, so I've spent the day on my own. I am really glad Izzy has gone on her little day trip though because its meant Adams had a day of undisturbed sleep, and I've managed to have a bit of a rest myself. I just feel exhausted, yet restless, if that makes any sense at all.
I'm going to make myself a nice strong coffee now, and try and crack on with some housework, because as daft as it seems, that normally cheers me up. I've got just less than 3 hours before i need to fetch Isabelle, so I'm going to have an hour of work, then theres a film on i want to watch. So hopefully this gloomy mood will fizzle away this evening. If not within the next couple of hours, I'm sure it will when i get a snuggle and a beautiful smile from my little girl!
I have got four New Years Resolutions which i am determined to stick to this year.
1) Lose weight!! I want to lose approximately 3 stone. I put so much weight on when i was pregnant (and quite a bit during the months before) and my confidence is at rock bottom at the moment. In fact, i haven't even had that many photo's of me with Isabelle, because i can hardly bare to look at myself. I think Adams getting pretty fed up of me moaning about it all the time! So by the end of 2012 i will be fitting in my size 10's again :p .. hopefully! I really am feeling determined with it though, and I've got good plans for weight loss this year :)
2) Be more careful with money. Obviously while I've been on Maternity leave, our money situation has been very different. In the end, we still managed to have a wonderful Christmas, but we're struggling for it now! I'm going to be a lot more careful about what i spend my money on, and aim to put £20 a month away so I've got it saved up to do my Christmas shopping in November. Every year so far, we've had to try and do all the shopping from one payday or two, and its really hard, so I'm determined to save throughout the year. Not just for Chrismas, in general.
3) Be more organised at home. If there are any of you reading this who have babies yourself, will you please comment on this post and let me know how you get on with housework and a little one please?
4) Spend more time as a family. We don't really get a lot of time to spend together, as Adam works Monday to Friday and then Referee's on Saturdays and Sundays. We normally have 1:30pm-6pm on a Sunday to spend together, and i want to make sure we really start to make the most of that time. I want to aim to visit family more too. Grandparents/Aunties and Uncles etc.. I don't want them to miss Isabelle growing up.
So they are my four resolutions.. nothing too difficult there i don't think, but I'm determined to work hard on each and every one of them :)
I've just had a message to say my baby girl is on her way back from Birmingham :) .. so I'd better get some work done while i still have the chance! Then she can snuggle up with me and we can watch the film together. Loneliness sorted! Feeling better already :)
Happy New Year!!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Three Months old!
My beautiful baby girl was three months old yesterday! It's actually scaring me how fast she is growing up. We have been supporting her in a 'sitting up' position more and more lately, and now she's discovered she can be upright, this is how she likes to be!
We are getting so many beautiful smiles and giggles, and she's very talkative now too! Sometimes it really sounds like she's trying to tell us a story!
She is sleeping approximately 8 hours through the night which is wonderful, we are both so proud of her.
We took her swimming for the first time on Monday (12.12.11). The water was quite cold, and she really wasn't too sure to begin with, but got fairly used to it as time went on.
We've been giving her a lot more 'tummy time' lately, which is really helping her to strengthen the muscles in her head. On Monday she held her head up beautifully whilst on her tummy and i was soooo proud of her, as this has been one of the things they were concerned about at the hospital.
Isabelle's first Christmas is fast approaching and its already pretty magical. We've really gone to town with decorations this year and she loves looking at all the lights.
We have a white Christmas tree with all baby pink decorations, including some home made ones, its perfect.
Time is flying by so quickly, I'm really trying to make the most of every second before i go back to work in April.
She now weighs 12lb 8oz which is 4lb 2oz bigger than her birth weight.
She's such a little Character now, sooo cheeky! Everyone who see's her, and gets a flash of that beautiful smile seems to fall instantly in love with her :)
She holds rattles and shakes them now too. Every day we spend half an hour singing songs, which she absolutely loves. She's a very busy little girl :)
Not my tiny baby anymore, but getting bigger and more beautiful by the day :)
xxx
Friday, October 7, 2011
3 weeks, 3 days!
Just a short update tonight :)
Isabelle is now 3 weeks and 3 days old! Its gone sooo fast and she's changing so much! I really feel like I'm beginning to get the hang of motherhood now :) We are settling into more of a routine and I'm getting more and more confident going out and about and feeding in public!
Little moomin is being weighed on Monday so it'll be interesting to see how much she's put on! I imagine she's definitely at least 10lb if not more by now!
She's focusing really well now and loves to look at faces! The wallpaper in our living room is black and white and she loves staring at that! She's also learnt to put her hand to her mouth now and loves to suck her fist!
Next Friday night is the first night we are having a babysitter (my mum) and going out. We are spending the evening with my work colleagues and I'm really looking forward to it (apart from having absolutely nothing to wear :/ ).
So i need to try and get her used to taking milk from a bottle, I'm going to express and do some practising this week to make sure she will feed for Grandma :)
I had my bridesmaids dress fitting last Saturday, its now 6 weeks and 2 days until my lovely sisters wedding and i cant wait! The dress zipped up, which is promising, but its very tight and wouldn't be comfortable to wear all day as i am now, so I'm desperate to get some weight shifted! It's tricky as I'm not supposed to do any exercise until 6 weeks after Izzy's birth! It's frustrating because i feel totally fine, but had better listen to the doctors! On a positive note though, i did 24 hours of walking with the pram last week! Walking shouldn't do any harm, so I'm trying to do as much as possible :)
Loving my little family millions :) xxx
Sunday, October 2, 2011
20 days
Our beautiful little girl is 20 days old already! Its scary how fast its going and how much she's changing already! She looks completely different to how she did when she was born. She's really starting to focus on faces now, and she has some amazing expressions! I literally cant take my eyes off of her, she makes me so proud every single day.
I have to hold my hands up and say parenthood is a lot harder than i was expecting. Everyone always tells you how hard it is etc, and there's no way i was expecting it to be easy but i have certainly been surprised. It hasn't been helped by the fact i was pretty useless for the first week, i almost feel like I'm a week behind with learning everything. I'd always imagined that it would be me teaching Adam a lot of things, but its ended up with him being a lot more confident than me, as he did everything for the first week!
Before Isabelle was born, i was fully aware that i would have to get used to the sound of a baby crying, I'm usually quite laid back so didn't think i would get stressed by it at all. One thing i didn't prepare for was how hearing her cry would make me feel. It actually breaks my heart. She's not a baby who cries constantly at all, but when she does it really gets to me. She seems to go through a phase every evening between 7pm and 3am where she constantly needs to be held. At first, she seemed to want to be feeding constantly, which was very tiring and was making me very sore, but now i think she gets tummy ache, and just generally wants comforting. When she gets really upset, she turns purple and stops breathing for several seconds! I find this so distressing and have ended up in tears myself on many occasions now.
Adam manages to stay quite chilled out though and helps to reassure me that she isnt as distressed as she looks.
The nights have been tricky, we've had a lot of visitors, and quite a busy schedule so far, so i haven't been managing to get much sleep through the day, so I've been pretty exhausted. Isabelle and I have both been a little poorly too, which hasn't helped, as even when she's sleeping I've struggled to get any rest.
The past two nights seem to have settled down though, she's going a lot longer between feeds now and is awake a lot more throughout the day which means she's more tired by the evenings, so hopefully we'll start to settle into a bit of a routine now!
I'm really happy with my decision to breastfeed. Its the most amazing thing in the world, i love how she looks up at me when she's feeding, she's perfect. Its been tough to begin with but I'm glad I've stuck it out, especially through the stage where i couldn't move and people had to latch her on for me. We both seem to have got the hang of it now though and its going well. I've even done my first couple of feeds in public (with help from my mum).
She's definitely feeding well as she's putting weight on fast! When she was born she was 8lb 6oz, three days later she was 7lb 12oz, and 8 days later she was 8lb 13oz! So she's probably well over 9lb by now!
She is all official now too, and has been registered and has a birth certificate!
So i am pretty much fully recovered after the birth, and all the paperwork etc has been done, so now its time to really be able to enjoy our lovely little lady :)
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