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Friday, September 20, 2013

Squishy.. The Birth Story. Part One.

Its taking me so long to write this birth story, i have decided to do it in two parts. So here is your first instalment....

In the couple of weeks leading up to my due date, i had several episodes of Braxton hicks, which was really frustrating as there were several occasions where i convinced myself it may be show time.  Sleep, once again became a thing of the past and i was getting increasingly uncomfortable. I spent most nights in the bath, as i did when pregnant with Izzy, as i was in so much pain with my legs and back. I began to get pretty fed up, praying i wasn’t in for another 13-day-late-induction sort of birth.
These photos were taken in July 2011 (right hand side)
 at 31+4, with Izzy. July 2013 on the left at 38+3 with Squishy.

Exactly a week before Squishys due date, i had a funny turn, which was pretty frightening. I was sitting on my birthing ball,watching telly with a little table with the laptop in front of me.  I was just chatting to a couple of friends on facebook, feeling absolutely fine one minute. All of a sudden i just went incredibly confused, normally i can type really quickly without even looking. Suddenly i was spelling everything wrong, unable to type properly and just generally writing a load of rubbish. I posted about 4 things on facebook which made absolutely no sense, but i couldn’t even figure out how to delete them. I wrote a quick message blaming the computer, then shut the lid of the laptop down and tried to snap out of it. Minutes later i lost my vision, i could just see colours, completely fuzzy and blurred, i then began to panic. Izzy was having a particularly unsettled night, and Adam had been in her room trying to get her to sleep for about an hour. It had only just seemed to go quiet so i really didn’t want to burst in and set her off again. Within minutes i lost the feeling in my arms and legs and so was completely petrified by this point. I staggered round the house, confused and in a mad panic, searching for my phone.

Unable to find it, i decided my only option was to go in to Adam. I opened the door to Izzys room and mumbled at Adam through the tears. He passed me his phone and asked what was wrong. I told him i just felt really ill but that i was going to ring my mum, so he should continue to concentrate on Izzy. I wobbled my way back down the stairs, and was now so confused i couldn’t even figure out how to dial my mums number. Eventually i managed to get hold of her. She immediately told me to call the emergency doctor, which i did. By now i was crying almost hysterically.

Adam came back downstairs with Izzy, worried and trying to figure out what on earth was going on, as i’d been absolutely fine the last time he saw me.

The people at the emergency centre said they needed to get help to me asap and that i needed to keep talking to them. They said that an ambulance and paramedics were on their way and that i would more than likely end up in hospital. I was still far from organised with my hospital bag, so attempted to rush round and grab a few bits.

Minutes later, my Sister Abi, and brother in law, Paul turned up. My mum had rung them and said i needed help, knowing that as they only live around the corner, they could be here within minutes.

The paramedic turned up first, he was doing a few basic health checks when we saw the blue flashing lights coming down the street. The ambulance arrived with two further paramedics. Abi and Paul gathered a few bits together for Izzy, and took her back to their house, as it was clear by now that we were going to be heading for hospital.

Once we got to the hospital, they attached me to all the monitors, and came and took more blood. I was having really strong Braxton hicks by this point, which the doctors were picking up on the monitors. They decided to examine me, and i was 1cm dilated. The midwife gave me a sweep and they decided  to keep me in, because of the contractions and because a lot of my symptoms were signs of preeclampsia. It was an awful night in hospital, i was contracting all night until 6am, and then it all just stopped. They let me go home at around 11am, when my mum came to fetch me.

I had some incredibly sad news a couple of weeks before Squishy was due. One of my old singing teachers, Miss Cook, had passed away. She was a huge part of my life for many years and a massive inspiration to me. She taught me so much and will always have a special place in my heart. There was an afternoon of dedications to her on the radio, and tributes were made in the local newspapers etc. She changed the lives of so many girls and my heart aches whenever i think about her passing.
Miss Cooks funeral was going to be on Monday 22nd July (two days after my due date) so i knew i wasn’t going to make it, as i didn’t want to risk causing drama by my waters breaking while i was there or something, plus i didn’t have childcare for Izzy. I was absolutely gutted to be missing my chance to say goodbye to the lady who had such an impact on my life. This photo was taken in China, just after we had won two gold medals in the world Choral Olympics.

My due date came and went, and i started to prepare myself for it ending as an induction again. We had a lovely day out at a charity fayre on the Sunday (day after due date). Adam, Izzy and I, with my mum and step dad joining us for a while too. We did loads of walking, which i knew would help to get the little lady moving.

That night, like so many before it, became a pretty restless one. I laid in bed chatting to my sister in law, Kelly, on facebook.  We started saying how we would just love my waters to break, so we would know for a fact that it’s the real deal. No uncertainty. That conversation ended at 23:48 and i attempted to get some sleep. I think i finally nodded off at about 12:30.

At 1:15 i was woken up by a little ‘trickle’. I jumped out of bed, wondering if this could be it. It was such a tiny amount, i was really unsure. My waters had gone ‘Hollywood style’ with Izzy, so this didn’t seem to be anything in comparison, but my heart was pounding, and i so so hoped it was the start.

I woke Adam up and told him i thought my waters had broken, his reply was ‘They wont have’, and he rolled over to go back to sleep! Charming! I gave him a little shake, and stood there trembling for about ten minutes trying to decide what to do. When i’d been in hospital the week before, they told me to ring as soon as my waters broke. I was so unsure, i didn’t want to look silly, ringing if id actually just slightly wet the bed or something, but i decided to ring anyway, just to be sure. I walked down the two flights of stairs to get to my hospital bag which was waiting by the front door. (This was Squishys bag, mine was still incomplete). I got my pregnancy notes out and dialled for the midwife. I explained i was really unsure whether it was anything or not, and that i felt really silly. The midwife was lovely and told me not to feel daft. She said for me to keep really active, get on my ball and walk about lots to see if i lost any more water. She also told me to put a pad on, so that i could check the colour of the water (as it had been mainly blood with Izzy). She instructed me to ringer her back in an hours time and tell her how i was.

By the time i got back up to the top floor of the house, i had more water steadily trickling down my legs. I knew at this point that it was the real thing. I felt a sudden rush of panic for what i knew i was about to go through. I had a few tears, and a little shakey moment in the bathroom, then managed to quickly pull myself together. I rang the midwife back and told her that i was now sure it was my waters, and she told me to leave it around 45 minutes, (as she already had three ladies to look after) and then set off for the hospital so that they could check me over. I rang my mum at around 1:55am and told her that things were starting, but that she probably wouldn’t be needed for quite a while, as i wasn’t having any pains yet. I then rang Abi to tell her that we’d be dropping Isabelle of in about half an hours time.

Then the mad panic began, i was rushing round the house, still trickling water everywhere, desperately trying to get the last few bits together for my hospital bag. Adam went into the kitchen to get me a couple of pairs of clean leggings, as it was clear i was going to need them. As he got into the kitchen, a moth which was literally the size of my hand span came in, so he spent a good ten minutes dashing around the kitchen in his pants, chasing a moth with a spatula! That was certainly a moment i wont ever forget.
Finally, we were ready to leave for the hospital...

Both of these photos were taken one day after my due date. Izzy on the left, Squishy on the right. What a difference in bump size! It's hard to believe i carried Izzy for a further 12 days after this photo was taken!

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